progress of a portrait

die angst vor dem salon

ausschnitt auftragsportrait

couch portraits

The confrontation of the individual with his/her social environment is marked by moments of tension that call for a fluctuation of values in order to be resolved. The values that are hereby altered, shifted or deconstructed are very seldom collective ones. Most of the time the individual is forced to bend to the canon of social norms in order to avoid becoming an outcast and suffering disadvantage, discrimination and sometimes even aggression. In any case, suppressing one’s own characteristics in order to fit into prevailing roles and schemes is the easier route to take.

Among the many existing examples of such phenomena, I was especially fascinated by the kinds of self-description one encounters on gay internet platforms. In many cases such descriptions set up a distinct gap between the real and the virtual person. The distortion of characteristic features is motivated largely by a sort of ideal conception to which the individual desires to conform. It is evident that the gay community makes use of rules that are quite different from the conventions of the heteronormative system. Due to the relative absence of classical family structures (i.e. marriage, children) quite unconventional and open forms of friendship and sexuality are common. At the same time the urge to remain incognito, rooted in widespread homophobia, results in a certain degree of concealment. The ambivalence between exhibitionism and concealment creates a vague idea of a person, and this vagueness raises the question as to the “real” person behind the façade.

In the course of this fascination I began to ask men with whom I had become acquainted on gay online platforms to act as models for me. The almost life-sized portraits (140×160cm) are painted in my atelier, always at the same place. The ambience as well as the display detail varies only marginally. The models position themselves on an old red couch and must be present for the whole painting process. Thus I avoid working with photos and am confronted intensely with the actual person. It takes several weeks to finish a picture, during which time I am afforded a completely different view of the person, quite incomparable to the knowledge gleaned from their internet profile. The result is a painted characterisation of a person that can then be juxtaposed with the original internet self-portrayal. There still remains the question as to which of the two is more authentic, or if both are (perhaps only a small) part of the same person’s individuality.
The theoretical background for this project is formed by various aspects of gender- and queer theory, and the most important artistic impulse comes from the work of British portrait-painter Lucian Freud.

more couch portraits

confirmation

i always wanted to do a classical full size portrait. i finally did one as a gift for my sister’s confirmation – a high speed-painting

sobering up

in solemnly remebrance of the days that where entirely spent with daft movies

be headed